Crepypasta: El virus extraterrestre

 Estaba yo el otro dia hablando con mi amigo sobre como seria la vida en otros planetas, proponia que si solo aqui en la tierra existen los virus, seres no considerados vivos, sino solo ADN en capsulas que invaden otras celulas, segun las condiciones de otros planetas podrian ser una forma de vida tan diferente a lo que persivimos como vida que nisiuqiera notaramos que estan vivos, podrian ser formas de vida liquidas o gaseosas.

Entonces mi amigo ABB me conto la historia, ha habido mas viajes al espacio de los que estan documentados, la gente dice que realmente no hay nada en el espacio por lo que valga la pena, salir, pero una de las razones es porque en uno de sus viajes, un astronauta habia viajado al espacio, con el vacio del espacio no esperaban nada vivo ahi, 

El virus estraterrestre infecto al astronauta, cuando llego a la tierra sangro por cada orificio del cuerpo, y tocio sus propios organos, La situacion fue critica y a todos los afectados los encerraron en un sitio hermetico, en donde el virus aun permanece y nadie se ha molestado en entrar ahi, no se sabe si el virus es capaz de resistir el vacio del espacio ¿sera acaso capaz de resistir las altas temperaturas y el alcohol?

Talvez con la pandemia pareceria una exageracion, pero hay una diferencia, ese virus, en 12 horas mata a sus huespedes, mientras que el coronavirus tarda 14 dias en mostrar sus resultados, osea la clave para detener las pandemias es que el virus se manifieste de inmediato.

Esta historia la he intentado buscar en internet ha ver si hay alguna version mas detallada, pero no ,la mayoria de crepypastas del espacio hablan sobre como un alien es autopciado en una perspectiva inversa, de abduciones extraterrestres o de cosas que pasarian en un futuro viaje, como descubrir que somos una simulacion de software o que los demas seres nos consideran lo que nosotros consideramos a las tribus aisladas del amazonas o peor que nosotros seamos el pequeño nuevo pez en al arresife y los demas formas de vida los peces expertos ocultandose del tiburon . Asi que por favor, si alguien sabe de que crepypasta o de que historia se origina lo que les conte les invito a escribirlo en los comentarios.

Crepypasta: Abstinencia

Con las voces de Snyder's cut

 

Resumen: Supermansion

 El otro dia me estaba viendo comedy central, cuando derepente me vi algo llamado Supermansion, al principio pense que era Un capitulo de pollo robot urlandose de los superheoroes, pero no, es una serie real .

Todo inicia cuando Titaniun Rex,, un subtopiano, que es algo asi como superman pero que vino del centro de la tierra llega por accidente a la superficie, su mision es conquistarla, pero termina encariñandose con la misma.

Y hasta su primera liga de la justicia formada por una especie de capitan america llamado American Ranger y oro llamado Red Omega, 

Ranger queda atrapado en un tunel del tiempo y Rex manda a omega a buscarlo en la antartida, Hasta entonces Rex tenia problemas, Era adicto al sexo y se acosto con una supervillana que no se porque pero me recuerda a la mala de Brave man.

Pasan los años y Rex ahora viejo forma otra liga de la libertad, conformado por una gata que en uno de sus enfrentamientos evoluciono, una especie de Batman llamado Black saturno, Con su propio bromas , jubot, un robot judio que Rex compro en una estafa , un drogadicto que cuando no consume su suero se hace debilucho llamado Brad y American Ranger que pudo salir del tunel del tiempo

Despues de una fallida detencion de un villano gordo llamado Manchas El sargento agonia intenta cerrar la liga porque despifaran su dinero que sale de orden publico pero logran declarar sus impuestos a tiempo.

Luego Rex se entera de la muerte de red omega y adoptan a sus mascotas que al final resultaron ser malos y se comieron a Red omega, mientras que ranger se entera que fue por culpa de rex que quedo atrapado y ahora se va a un retiro espiritual que termina con un mostro atacandolos. y vencen a las mascotas con la mascota de saturn

Luego de todo eso llega un viejo rival de Rex, Bleiser, quien aunque vio que Rex estaba viejo y  se lastimo la espalda, se aleja, rex sintiendose viejo intenta encajar con la chavisa y hasta le hacen un remix. Rex decia que mientras el equipo crea en el seguira siendo un heroe, pero al ver que el equipo hizo votaciones para decidir si rex estaba muy viejo se va deneuvo al centro de la tierra,  pero en el camino ve que todos votaron no y decide volver, justo a tiempo porque Bleizer habia visto el YTPH y havia decido volver y descrubirmos que solo Rex es el unico con la fuerza para enfrentarse a Bleizer, mas Rex se rinde, pero era una trampa para vencer a Bleizer

Luego graban un comercial pero como la gata cooch no sabe leer el anuncio se vuelve una verguenza nacional y cooch tiene que terminar la escuela, mas la unica forma de concentrarse era con drogas, asi que se va a vivir con su vieja dueña, pero al final regresa . A ESTE TRUCO LO LLAMO, SALVAR EL SEMESTRE EN LA ULTIMA SEMANA

Y si se acuerdan del polvo que Rex se dio con la villana mantiz, pues de ello nacio Lex  Lighnig, quien al principio Rex tenia miedo de la paternidad y la abandono en una isla, pero mas miedo le tiene a la imagen publica y la agrega a la liga, mientras los demas intentan conquistarla formando una banda judia.

Ya y despues de que se le acaba el suero los demas toman eso como excusa para escaparse de la noche de juegos donde nos enteramos de la terrible verdad

El resto de la serie es un misterio porque no hay clips en internet, la wikipedia esta abadonada y el unico lugar donde se pueden encontrar clips en latino es en el facebook  de comedy central quien venga a saber porque tienen el doblaje latino pero solo lo pasan en ingles subtitulado

Lo que se es que luego Lex se vuelve malvada, matan a brad y llega el hermano de rex junto con los subtopianos a conquistar la tierra.

El tiktoker simp

 

Reseña Zafari

 Zafari es la historia de Zomba, un elefante con colores de zebra que tras ser rechazado por su manada se muda a una isla donde habitan animales cuyo color pertenece al de otras especies.

La verdad cuando vi esta serie por primera vez pense que el plot del episodio era que habian inercambiado de colores, pero no, esa es la premisa de la serie.

La serie es episodica y trata de dar lecciones de moral, Como cuando te peleaste con tu mejor amigo, cuando dejas que los demas te controlen y si lo dejas asi te va a doler cuando des un alto, O que para que algo sea especial tratarlo como si tuviera un invitado especial, la verdad con ese cap pense que trataria del regreso de la manada de zumba, pero no . ellos mismos eran los invitados especiales

No tentiendo que es eso de dar datos random de los animales que ni aparecen al final del capitulo

Segun wikipedia la serie acabab con que Zomba regresaba a su manaba, no me moleste en ver si ese es el final real de la serie.

Una curiosidad que no puedo comprobar porque no hablao ingles, pero creo que el koala y la canguro hablan con acento australiano como los pandas con los colores invertidos con acento chino

Me resulta curioso que esto originalmente fue subido al canal Nat Geo Kids, pero ese canal seria de alguna manera fusionado con Diney

Konosuba the Iceberg

Did you know? Aqua is the one who attracted Berdia, since when she arrived with Kazuma, she emanated an aura that attracted many monsters, including Host, a demon that almost killed Megumin and Yunyun and Veldia was sent to the beginner's village with the sole mission of investigating what that pulse was, later after her death Vanir was sent to discover what happened to Berdia.

What makes Aqua superior to Eris?

The priest from Chapter 1 said that Aqua is superior to the goddess Eris. I saw a Reddit post that said Aqua is not only a goddess of water, an essential element for all life, but also the preserver of life. Her powers of purification and healing are concrete proof of this. I'm sure not many people know this. But she's also a muse because she masters all forms of art, which makes her a more important deity. Or maybe it's just the faith of her believers. 

the day 

So, adventurer, Satou Kazuma, here's the reward for the annihilation of the Demon King's general, Sylvia: 300 million Eris.

At this point, the star adventurer of Axel's guild is Kazuma. Thanks to that, the guild is prospering quite a bit. I might even have the building remodeled. Oh no. Kazuma, this is the 4th general you've defeated, right?

Forget it. You won't get anything from me by flattering me. The best I can do is treat you to the best sake in town.

Whoa, yay!

Later.

Hey Aqua, you've been holding that egg for a while. What's it?

Listen and be amazed, Kazuma. It's nothing more than a dragon egg.

A DRAGON'S?

Want to know how I got it? Well, when I'm home alone

IT'S AN HONOR TO MEET HER

I'm an honest merchant excited to meet the archpriest who defeated four of the Demon King's generals

Enough, I'm ashamed

So I want to offer you this special product, just for you

And that's how I got the egg

Aqua, how much did the egg cost you?

All the money I had, and the cheapest dragon eggs don't cost more than 100 million Eris

And I even decided on his name, Emperor Zeltman, but when he's a child, I'll call him Emperor Zell.

Another day

I also want you to tell my future

The money you'll earn by overexploiting Wiz will be gone as soon as I have a free moment. You see, I can tell the future too.

Okay, people, at this point in the Vanir novel, besides saying that if you want to see Aqua's future you could go blind, it mentions that from that egg a chicken will be born, destined to be eaten, but I couldn't find the cartoon in the manga, so I'll skip straight to its birth.

Ha, you deserve it, traitor.

Give me back my Emperor Zell.

Pie.

Give him back.

This chick chose Momoi.

What the hell happened here?

Well, you see,

When we were arguing with this pervert, he flew over me and said "Vanir style" with his laser beam. Then he repelled it against Darkness and I counterattacked, but he used Wiz as a Lich shield and began to disappear. I thought it was the perfect opportunity to get rid of him.

And Emperor Zell was born.

Stay away from him, you're a bad influence on my little one.

No need to say it, I was already leaving.

Stay away from him, you're a bad influence on my little one.

It must be because the first thing he saw when he was born was Momoi.

But seeing how things are, there's no other choice: move.

And I thought I'd already gotten used to the inhabitants of this world.

Well, if you'll excuse me.

Why do people in Konosuba waste their skill points so foolishly?

For the same reason people in our world waste their time improving their skills playing video games, editing YouTube videos, or using useless knowledge of cartoons, gossip, and coding.

We improve the wrong skills, when people who have worked in the fields their entire lives are experts in the land, those who read books are experts in how to write and express themselves, and those who spent their time reading and solving derivatives and integrals as children are experts at solving differential equations.

the women don't wear bras in Konosuba

A fact that Argonaura69 gave me about Konosuba, at least from what we've seen in the anime, is that women don't wear bras. Because of this Japanese cultural conceit, they make panties with designs and embroidery, but no woman wears a bra, you degenerates.

Does Aqua have a mother?

A piece of information Leonardotrentacoste3772 gave me says that Aqua has a belly button, meaning she was born. It was already known that Zenarith from Fighters Will Be Dispatched! and Regina, also from Konosuba, are sisters. If they're related, they must have parents.

Onilink also says that angels and demons don't have gender, but it's possible they can choose it and even have a child. However, it's believed they would lose their immortality.

I'm talking about this with characters like Vanir and several demons who say he's more powerful than the Demon King. In the case of demons, I don't think it applies that way, first because sex is something that relates to them. And in these web novels, Vanir and Maxwell were siblings, and it's explicitly mentioned that they both killed their mother.

But I'm getting off topic. Does Aqua have a mother?

Aqua doesn't have sexual organs? Konosuba

There's a theory floating around on the internet that Aqua doesn't have sexual organs, and they don't talk about her not having a uterus and in any case being sterile. But the Reddit Hypothesis says plainly that Aqua doesn't have a vagina, she has nothing downstairs, as if she were a doll and that's why she's not embarrassed about going without underwear. Now I say this is false because Aqua without underwear is a visual joke in the anime and has no impact or interaction in the work. In the manga and novel, she does wear underwear. Also, in the novel, Aqua makes explicit reference to not wanting Kazuma in the same hot springs as her for fear of what might happen to her chastity. Also, considering all the times Aqua has bathed with other women present, I think some would point out that it's weird that there's nothing down there. 

DID YOU KNOW? Toilets in Konosuba

Did you know? While Konosuba is a fantasy world with a medieval theme, the bathrooms don't have latrines, but toilets. This is because the Japanese who have been reincarnated in that world have been bringing concepts from the contemporary world. The irony is that they are Western toilets, not Asian ones. Yes. Even the Japanese know that it's more comfortable to defecate sitting down than on their knees.

Why hasn't anyone in Konosuba ever defeated the Demon King?

All reincarnated creatures are dependent on the item or talent Aqua gave them.

All it takes is for some adventurer with the power of Steal to steal their weapon, and that's as far as they go.

Needless to say, Kazuma is still alive because Aqua revives him. Given the opportunities, Kazuma learned how to survive in that world without a weapon or powers that were literally given to him.

Mitsorugi was also defeated when, although his sword wasn't stolen, he was deprived of the ability to use it by blocking it with ice. From then on, although we see other reincarnated creatures, this one stands out because he's still alive, having learned his weakness, pointed out by Kazuma,

how to survive in that world without a weapon or powers that were literally given to him.

Can Aqua die? (Konosuba)

In Konosuba, Wolbach, who is also of Aqua's species, died in an explosion. According to the novel, Aqua wasn't at her peak condition when she descended. Wolbach was the same, as Wolbach, since her power was split in half. Ultimately, I think if Aqua were to die, she would appear before Eris as just another soul, without her powers. But let's see what the Reddit otakus say. Aqua can revive herself. She's revived Kazuma many times, and she might do it because she's forced to follow Kasuma as her trap object. Eris herself might even revive her. In the last volume, it's revealed that Aqua can revive anyone, but she'd have to face legal confrontations. Seeing as Vanir can return to life as a second mask, Aqua probably has something like that too. She could simply stay in heaven as a goddess again, but she's too stupid to realize it. And then there are more comments that he must defeat the demon king and generals first.

Aqua's Sad Fate in Konosuba   Natsume Akatsuki's Frieren

Vilanos de no way home ajustando su apariencia a la de los comics